Wonderland, what’s that?

Hah! I imagined an illusionary world.

But I wished for it to be nice,

What do I get?

A complete disaster?

No, this won’t be a space to satiate your soul…

for what you read otherwise,

But yes!

as this place exemplifies,

Now is the time to elucidate on loss…

I now access that dreaded vault and freeze what I feel,

Rejection isn’t easy…

Maybe you have not faced it!

You glace your ‘NO’ with some absurd concept.

Finding happiness…

Well, isn’t that all we seek,

But yes, if my absence leads you to your chosen path,

then so it shall be.

Move head, as I smother the so-called-stupid-concept-of-wonderland,

I will move on… like I have a choice?

But always regret this not ‘working out’…

And for me it’s all because of you.

While you invert the argument and say it’s because of me.

Fine either ways, its not meant to be.

I wish it would have,

but if my wishes came true…

where would I know about loss,

and wouldn’t happiness come to me as well.

Ah! but I forget that path is ‘exclusive’ to you.

In search of your happiness, I wish you all the luck

As I step aside and let you do so.

A trip to Wonderland

So for May 30,

Would I settle for ‘nothingness’?

Nah! actually there is something I do want…
[refer to https://variantrhyme.wordpress.com/2013/05/19/open-letter-to-the-rabbit/ ]

There might be oblique references,

But I like it like that…

It’s like the hide-and-seek mode.

Mostly you are hidden and I keep seeking..

Nonetheless, let me tell you about  ‘Wonderland’,

It emerges each time I am with you, [rtc heavenly abode?]

With whatever happens, whatever you say and do…

All of it comes under its purview.

The endless thoughts circle,

Well… the state of speechlessness and nervousness persists,

There is a thrill… it generates,

And I love it.

So, before I think ‘the vault’ is the final answer,

let me see, if wonderland is what ‘you’ give me.

You know in that ‘nothingness’ exists that wonderland…

In the simplicities, niceties and care…

so, this is direct enough,

a sort-of-conclusion to the ‘open-ended letter’ to the Rabbit!

To stop munching on the carrot, and hop ahead!

Dissociated Response

Moving ahead of delayed response lies dissociation,

Five steps taken back gradually…

Change is disturbing yet exciting,

but most of all if the delay continues,

it is dissociation that follows.

So at a time when one feels a lot,

While the other seems evasive.

Then fine, let it be so.

It is time to visit that vault-cum-freezer,

and store all possible emotions…

and forget about their existence.

the path towards progress seems easier then,

with no emotional outrage to disrupt.

so if inaction persists during ‘delayed response’

then my love, only dissociation follows.

 

 

A simple analysis

So I am combining all the distorted images,

Be it relevant or not…

Begins with a want to simplify,

Your simplicity attracts…

Honestly overwhelms.

There is a sense of knowing,

I can see it in your eyes.

But then with having said it all here,

What do I do?

Still ‘patiently wait’.

Fine, I am doing so now.

Let me observe you,

See what you exactly do.

Meanwhile, I manage and remove all existing distractions.

My focus is clear,

It is on You.

Intensity is deepening,

And you give me some theory of natural progression…

Still I would want to wait,

Sadly, I tend to bury my emotions…

In my mind’s deepest corner.

But I don’t want that to happen,

Please don’t let it…

Because there – it is not a vault,

It is a freezer.

Where melting isn’t an option.

The nervousness persists, the speechlessness continues…

I’d want to believe there is time,

For me to have you.

 

Note: when I pen the last word, you call me. 😉

So-called-Film Review Go Goa Gone

 

Cast:Saif Ali Khan, Kunal Khemu, Vir Das, Anand Tiwari, Puja Gupta

Director: Raj Nidimoru and Krishna D K

Welcome to our very own desi-zombieland, as Go Goa Gone slickly  opens up a whole new genre for Bollywood. Comedy intermixed with horror. Saif Ali Khan in his Russian-cum-Dilli look manages to charm you. Three friends – Vir Das, Kunal Khemu and Anand Tiwari decide to go for a roadtrip-cum-business trip to Goa. Kemu aka Hardhik (the pun is in-your-face), Vir aka Luv (whose love life is a mess, and goes to Goa to sleep with women to get over a heartbreak) and finally the simpleton and geek Bunny. Luv is easily enticed by a hottie Luna (Kemu calls her a scooty) who invites him for him visit a lonely island for a rave party thrown by a Russian mafia. Thus begins the wacky ride for the trio, but the thrill and fun takes a turn as next morning after the crazy party, they encounter zombies who are feeding on humans. So, begins the adventure as they try saving their asses from the freaks.

Daaru, drugs and smoking is portrayed comfortably as each of these youngsters indulge in them heartily, except Bunny (but he gives in on the day of the rave party). A rave party in Goa, reminds one of Deepika Padukone’s item number Dum Maaro Dum. But here the songs are better especially the lyrics.Two songs – Khoon Choos Le and Baba ji ki Booti exemplify this and are simply amazing. The language is contemporary akin to the tastes of the youngsters- Ma, Behen expletives are used casually. The three slip into their characters easily. The story isn’t much to rant about on how they keep running about the island, then discover how to save their lives – as cocaine is the drug which freezes the zombies. Saif Ali Khan as Boris (pronounced Baris!) is superb. His broken Russian accent coupled with a desi dash is mind-blowing. You seem to be seeing a desi version of those Hollywood teenage horror flicks- I know what you did last summer, Scream and others in the category.
The humour is simple and crisp. The trio try and understand what these creatures are – in the process – they came up with ideas to kill them, if they can be exposed to sunlight and would die. One of them says Oh that is vampires. They finally conclude these creatures are zombies but don’t know how to kill them. This film although comes across a short fun one, can be seen once and forgotten.The lady – Luna- (Puja Gupta) hasn’t much to do, but to show off her toned body and make apparent witty comments. It seems a lil gift from Pataudi sahaab to his sister’s boyfriend- Khemu whose career seems to be frozen.Soha Ali Khan’s faces also appears for a split second, as Khemu remembers his heart break, in the process to convince Luna for a lay.
Vir is at the Delhi Belly best. You love the sequence when the sidekick friend explains the Hindi film concept of the hero’s friend being killed. But Khemu comes and saves him and proves the stereotypical Bollywoodisque plot wrong. Saif is at his experimentative best, laden with tattoos, blonde hair and the Terminator ( I will be back) dialogue delivery, making him wickedly pleasing. Get on,and enjoy the desi zombie-ride!

Senseless Sensibility

There seems sense in this…

But I don’t know how?

You are right in front of me,

Speaking…

My mind is absorbing each word with utmost care,

But the heartbeat is racing rapidly.

You are explaining things,

Revisiting your past…

I am hearing it all,

But my mind isn’t there.

The mind is with you.

It has created its own world.

And it wants things in its own way.

But then reality strikes and vodka is consumed…

Yes! now tell me…

As one tends to snap into the real world…

It all makes sense suddenly,

But still seems senseless.

Out of Control

The mind is out of control,

It does what it wants…

One scene which I imagine,

Lingers on…. haunts me.

I reconstruct it with intricate care,

Then smash it…

Then again redesign the framework,

But the mind isn’t happy…

It is a perfectionist after all.

Most cases, I can prejudge the response,

But in this one, the mind can’t decipher…

So there’s anger brewing at being mocked naively…

Leading to sleepless nights,

Its strange you ask me why I don’t sleep?

When you know very well why.

This and no more…

Okay! I give up…

 

This and no more…

I think I have said it all.

 

I have laid my heart bare,

But now I will play by the rules.

 

The way you want me to put up the facade,

So I will do.

 

Don’t doubt my acting abilities,

I possess the talent to surprise you.

 

I’ve told you always,

Don’t underestimate me.

 

I think I took five steps ahead,

Now I’m retracting back to square one.

 

If patience is the key,

Then I am ready to wait…

 

And watch,

How things unfurl.

 

I will immerse myself,

In so much more…

 

That the thought of you will just haunt,

It will linger…

 

But I will stick to the ground I choose now,

If there is way, you will have to walk up the four steps now and take it.

 

This and now no more…

 

Open Letter to the Rabbit!

Wonderland, where are you?

 

Baby, look beyond the Leooopaaard dots,

There is a wonderful life waiting for you.

Move beyond the self-questioning-mode,

Here is what I will tell you what/who I want for my birthday….

Wait, it’ll come right at the end,

Before that let me clarify the whys.

No obliqueness,

Let me get this straight to you.

Each time I see you,

I want to envelop you.

 

And then you say ‘pan naturally’,

Its a slap on my face.

The facade of friendship,

Is difficult to keep…

But anyway I play along…

Hush, don’t rush!

But the heart doesn’t listen,

It is engulfed.

The mind, well…

It is on its own plane.

What you talk, say, do…

I want to know it all.

It intrigues me each time,

Each mundane activity seems so interesting.

Meeting you each time,

Seems new.

I can’t get enough of you…

Why, don’t you understand that?

Or you don’t want to?

But why?

Anyway, this will be endless,

Lest I bring this to an end.

So let me tell you what I want for the 30^th,

It is YOU!

Subdued emotions

Emotive Silence

 

It seems ‘normal’…

But what’s that?

 

Whatever you might do or say…

I still feel the same.

The reason remains unchanged,

Which made me react like that the day before.

 

I don’t regret it, because my feelings are true,

You seem restrained.

 

There is a lot on your mind,

I know that, but try reasoning it out.

 

I know there will be a favourable answer.

Try not being dismissive, you will see the picture clearly.